Friday, May 18, 2012

Things I'm Afraid to Tell you

I Love blogs, I'm sure you do too. But the major flaw with blogging is the idea that everything is perfect, our homes, our husbands, our children . . . our lives. Everyone seems to have it all together all the time. That's why I was thrilled to see the movement among bloggers, started by Jess from Make Under My Life, to share the parts of our life that aren't so 'picture perfect'.
 So here goes nothing . . .
1) I worry A LOT! More then the average person, like way more then the average person! I blame it on my fascination with hospital dramas, like E.R. and Grey's Anatomy!  Lee is constantly telling me to relax but for some reason I feel like if I worry about it, then it won't happen . . . right?? WRONG! It's something I'm working on, but part of me thinks that this is just who I am.

2) I have a strained relationship with my in-laws. I seriously debated including this one, I think there's a fine line between airing dirty laundry and meaningful sharing. I'm sure I'm not the only one dealing with this . . . don't get me wrong, there are no screaming matches or name calling, they're nice people . . . we're nice people, we're just different. Although it's not perfect I do have a lot of respect for them . . . they did raise the most amazing man I've ever met! :)
I wanted you to know that if you're going through this too, that you're not alone.

3) I put on a much braver face then what's actually going on. If you've read about our struggles with starting a family, I always end by saying that I'm very hopeful we'll have children in the future. Most days I am very hopeful . . . but not everyday. Some days the fear creeps in, and I'm paralyzed with the thought that we may never have any children.

4) We've had some very negative comments on the blog. From time to time we get some down right nasty comments on here. I've never addressed them before because I think that when you argue back you're just giving them what they want. I've been called a twit, I've been called a Princess, Someone once emailed me to tell me that if Lee leaves me I'm screwed, I'm not sure exactly what they meant by that but I just hit the delete button. I would be lying if I said, I just let these things roll off my back, they do affect me . . . deeply sometimes. But I let out a little cry, Lee tells me he thinks I'm awesome and I move on (maybe that's what that person meant when they said I'd be screwed without Lee . . . who would tell me I'm awesome?) hehe

5) I Curse WAY more in real life then I do on the blog. Sometimes I worry that when I write it sounds like everything is all , "fudge", "fiddlesticks" and "Oh Darn". When in reality it's way closer to "Beep beep Beep beep beep I hate this Beep'in Sewing Machine . . . BEEP my life!" (in case your wondering, that was a word for word exert taken from my life).

6) I don't multitask well at all. I realize If I want children this is something I'm going to need to learn how to do, but for now . . . I had to spit my gum out to write this post . . . writing and chewing is too much multitasking for me. ;)

7) I hate my voice! You would think this would make me talk less, but apparently I don't hate it that much because I still talk A LOT! The reason we've never done a video house tour is because I'm awkward and weird. When I'm in front of a camera I get what Lee calls my phone voice, it's where my voice goes 10 octaves higher then normal and I talk really really fast! This June for our 2nd Blogaversary I'll be filming our first VLOG, a video house tour . . . please be kind! :)

8) I have two tattoos a Canadian Maple Leaf and Lee's name. Lee has one tattoo and it's my name. His is on his wrist and mine is on my hip (low on my hip . . . way too close to my butt to show to thousands of people in Internet world!). Here's Lee's:

Phew . . . all over! Oh and here's my newest addition:

9) I'll hit post on this and you'll all realize I'm Crazy ;) hehe.

132 comments:

  1. Not crazy at all! Thanks so much for your honesty, and I share some of the things on your list! As for the negative comments, it seems like the anonymity of the Internet allows people to say things that they wouldn't say under normal circumstances, since there aren't any consequences. Just remember, jealousy can bring out the ugly in people!

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  2. These things are not so insurmountable! They're life. The fact that you are blogging at all says alot about who you are, don't you think? I think it means you personally have stepped out of your shell of comfort and I agree with Jenny above. Anonymous people say cruel things. You keep doing your lovely blog and focus on the multitudes of good comments, your loving husband and all the positive people in your life and you'll be fine! Thanks for sharing...I swear like crazy when I'm impassioned about a subject. I was a 911 Operator afterall...hahahaha! But, like you, I keep it clean for the blog. xo wendy

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  3. Hi Ashli,
    Thank you so much for sharing! It does make you even more "real" for us readers.
    1.Me too! I worry so much that I am sometime sick (literally). At one point I spoke to a professional about it, and she told me to write down my worries and I find that helps. Not necessarily journaling, but just noting what I am worried about. It helps! I guess the idea is that I am acknowledging the worry and it can get out of my head for a bit... who knows.

    2. Me too! Why can't my in-laws be like me? How can the person I love the most in the world be related to them? It just doesn't make sense...

    3. I hope you have a child one-way or another. I think there are MANY people in a similar position and hopefully you'll not only get your little peanut/bean, but also help and inspire others.

    4. I don't understand the negative comments. If they don't like what you're doing or posting about, why do they read it? Obviously they are interested, so the only logical response is that they are jealous, and to that I say: sucks to be them! :-)

    Thanks again for sharing! Have a nice long weekend

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  4. Ashli,

    you are wonderful just the way you are. Ignore the haters and stay positive. A baby will come your way when the time is right.

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  5. I loved learning more about you!!!
    1) You are in good company.
    2) I have a few strained relationships with family members as well.
    3) Goes with #1.
    4) I don't post frequently, so haven't had that issue, but didn't have some creep comment on one of the girls (hence why I do NOT use their names).
    5) More than I'd like to admit.
    6) I try, but quite often fail miserably! Usually happens when cooking dinner.
    7) Cannot wait for this one!! I love putting a voice to a face. Don't focus on the camera, but on Lee if he is the one taking the video. You wouldn't talk in the higher octave to him would you? Trust me, it'll work!!!
    8) No tattoos, but my ears are double pierced (risky, I know!!!)
    9) I won't commit you anytime soon, LOL
    Love ya Ashli!!!

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  6. That would be DID have some creep comment on one of the girls!

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  7. Ashli,
    I wouldn't worry too much about the negative people in this world. Like others have said they must be jealous, or unhappy and down so they try to bring others down. I too am a worrier, nothing extreme, but I do worry about things. I have zero relationship with the MIL, but then hubby doesn't have much either. I guess that is what happens when you marry someone she doesn't approve of. My FIL passed away last August. He was the only true family we had. I also have zero relationship with the family I was born into. They were abusive growing up and it continued through adulthood, so I don't associate with them. Someday, you will have children. Like someone said above, there are many like you. My little tiny neighborhood of about 40 houses, three families have adopted because they have infertility issues. No tattoos for me or any extra piercings, boring huh! LOL Oh and I hate my voice too. ;) Have a great weekend!!! Just remember you have plenty of people here that think you are pretty wonderful...

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  8. Oh you are so normal! Not one of those things surprised me:) I have a strained relationship with my inlaws (especially my MIL, who despite that strained relationship still somehow thought it would be acceptable to ask me if she can watch me push a baby out of my vagina), I hate my voice, I used to live in constant depression and paralyzing fear that would would never have children (when we were going through infertility the first time around), if I get a negative blog comment my whole day goes in the crapper (I turned off anonymous comments because people don't say the same things when their name is attached to it), and after living with my friend and roommate in university I started swearing like a sailor (I've curbed it greatly since I have a 2 year old who repeats EVERYTHING... luckily he has no swear words in his vocabulary!)

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  9. Ashli this post is great. Thank you for sharing and being so honest. I love reading your blog for just this reason....you are REAL!
    Don't let the haters get to you. They are not happy with themselves that's why they hate on others. Lee is equally as blessed to have YOU as you are to have him. If your inlaws don't appreciate the amazing, caring, kind, loving person that you are, that's their loss. ((hugs))
    P.S. Can't wait for your VLOG! :)

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  10. Thanks so much for your honesty. Great post! I too think you're awesome;-). Oh and I thought I was the only person who hated her voice but not enough to stop talking. Glad I'm not alone, ha ha.

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  11. You're so awesome and brave to share your fears! And I can totally relate to the in-laws tension. Dealing with his family has made me question the whole concept of family...

    Anyway, keep ignoring any negative comments- people are cowards (and jealous, of course!). Can't wait for your video tour!

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  12. Ashli, I usually don't comment on the blogs I love, but felt compelled this time. It was nice learning more about you and I just wanted to wish you luck starting a family one day and to chime in with the previous posts that have said you should not take the negativity personally. Critical people that are nasty are sad, lonely people with major issues.
    I too had in law issues, but divorce mended that for me but not my daughter. Some people! I am now happily remarried and would have liked a child with my new husband but having the cr*p radiated out of my reproductive organs put the kibosh on that dream. I swear like a trooper and really need to learn to curb it. But I find it's a stress releaser, so hard to stop.
    Keep blogging and nevermind all the real crazies!

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  13. Wow, what a post. I think it's awesome and amazing that you opened up to your readers like this. A couple of your points resonated with me, you definitely aren't the only one with these thoughts. For what it's worth, I love your blog, it's probably my favourite that I follow. I only found you a few weeks ago and I get so excited when a new post pops up in my reader. I wish I was half as talented & crafty as you and that you lived near me cause I'd love to be friends with you (especially now that I hear you swear like a sailor :P)

    PS - Multi-tasking is not all it's cracked up to be. What's wrong with focusing on one thing until it's completed? There are studies that show multi-tasking is less productive than focusing on one thing at a time. Embrace your focus!

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  14. Ashli! I think what came as a huge surprise is that you are a worrier. From reading your blog I got the impression you are a happy-go-lucky girl with a great sense of humour who doesn't take herself or life too seriously! I can relate but my worry morphed into anxiety and panic disorder. :(

    The cursing...me, too! My mother always said I have the mouth of a sailor. I figure I'm in the privacy of my own home, sans kiddies, so...why not?

    In laws? I gave up on my self absorbed in laws. Life's too short. Why invest when there is no return? It hurts, actually, because all my friends have wonderful in laws and I can only wish.

    As for negative comments, well, jealousy is never becoming. People see your lovely home, you are an attractive, happily married couple...they envy you. Why that type continue to read the blogs about which they complain is beyond me, but...I'm not a mental health care professional!

    Love your blog and your enthusiam for all things domestic. Just ignore the negative nellies because their problems are their "stuff" and it's unfortunate for them they have to air their psychopathology on public forums, but...

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  15. Your honesty is great! It's so nice to see the real you in this post!

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  16. I think when we fear others think us crazy, they're actually thinking that we're normal. You seem a lot like me, which is comforting to know. Too often people put on their facade to the world that they're perfect so they aren't judged, and they are anyway. At the same time their perfection is discouraging because no one's really perfect, and it makes the rest of us feel like we're not measuring up. Admitting these things makes you seem that much more real and approachable. I'm glad you're brave enough to post it. :)

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  17. Thank you so much for sharing! It is so nice to hear honest thoughts in a world where everything seems so clean and perfect. So many people can relate to all your concerns, you are so not alone. Don't let the haters get you down, they are obviously unhappy in their own lives and take it out on the innocent. Keep up the great work! :)

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  18. Ashli I think you are great! Your honesty is refreshing. You are such an inspiration and I love your heart. Hugs to you for sharing things that just aren't easy to share! :)

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  19. Hi Ashli, I too HATE my voice...I don't mind hearing it when I'm talking but playing it back with me listening to it, is another story. I'll happily pose in front of a camera 100 times without any hestitation but put the video on and I feel like an idiot with that voice. I don't think you are alone on that!!!

    Whilst we all want to seem real and genuine on our blogs people want to feel inspired, uplifted or gather together to help someone out so in that vain (in all reality) we read blogs to de-stress and feel motivated so leaving out all the crap that goes with life is not such a bad thing... having feelings about wanting a baby and finding it hard is real, it's very normal and every second woman would relate to your pain. It's a sort of catch 22. I love coming to your blog because it's happy, motivating makes me want to decorate, meal plan and sew.... whether I achieve that or not I love seeing how your house is progressing in the decorating stakes. I have been writing a blog since May 2008 and had only 2 months before kicked my lying, cheating, drinking husband out of the house after years of this as myself and my children deserved better. I have not once written about it because quite frankly he does not deserve all the attention and I print my blog into a book and it's for the kids which is happy fun times with their mummy (me). I want to write about the good things in my life and not the bad as hell......I was living that and at this point in time still am on a very different level. I don't think people are trying to portray their happy fairy floss life but you don't want to write about depressing times either. It's not right or wrong either way but if I had to read another blog about someone elses marriage woes when I'm going through mine...I just wouldn't have the capacity. Wanting a baby is different because that's a banding together, offering hope advice etc. women supporting women. I certainly don't think you are not being real by sharing your good fun things.

    On the other hand,I cannot for the life of me understand why people (anom) people at that feel they have to target or be mean to people they don't know. If they think you are an idiot and don't like you posting about your perfect little life well no one is holding a gun to their head making them read your blog, once, twice or coming back to it. SERIOUSLY FOLKS. There are a couple of blogs in australia (and I'm sure everywhere) that I read, a nice little craft, country one which she posts a couple of little craft projects and nearly chose to shut down her blog because of the negative comments. I can't understand these people and they are bullies hiding behind "no name" they obviously are bitter, not confident and have no life if they have to do this...I do feel stronly about that and I know why a negative comment would affect you, you are human, it's hard even if it's not true. This is a long comment post for me.... I enjoy popping in to see your happy little posts and I don't mind if you have I'm feeling sad this week on the baby front either.........You are still you and it's your life you are writing about.........YOU CHOSE to write about which parts of it. Hang in there!! Kathy, Brisbane, Australia

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  20. I just love these posts. The doses of reality are refreshing and necessary! Thank you Ashli! xo

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  21. Ashli, I love you! Wish we could have met in person before I vacated the Pacific Northwest to the hot humid South. We'd have so much to talk about.

    Great blog post...every word made me love you more!

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  22. Fun post! Thanks for sharing.

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  23. I'm so sorry to hear you've gotten mean emails....that is terrible. Honestly, none of what you posted surprised me all that much, as we all experience fears, and most people have at least one strained relationship with a person in their life. The "haters" on various blogs seem to lack maturity and understanding that a blog is a small slice of life provided for the enjoyment or education of readers...I think of it like a magazine. Why would I get all worked up about the life of a magazine writer based upon her inspiring articles?? Similarly, a blog writer can't reflect every aspect of her life in what she writes.

    And about the multi-tasking and children - its something I struggle with as a mom of 3, and I am kind of an introvert. There is always someone asking a question, needing something...I tell them "one at a time," and we get their needs addressed. It is good for children to learn to be patient. You'll be a great mom, Ashli - have faith!

    I enjoy your wonderful content, your personality and your perspective. Keep on, keepin' on, Ashli!

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  24. I've been a silent lurker for a while but wanted to comment on this post. Thanks for keepin' it real, Ashli!! I love your blog and when first found it, went back and read each blog post from the beginning. You are truly an inspiration and I have gotten many ideas from you. I admit I did think you had the perfect life but you are human and face the same battles we all do. Thanks for having the courage to mention the "ugly" and "not so pretty" side of life :-)

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  25. I've been reading for a few weeks now, but I've never left a comment. I have really enjoyed poking around your blog for decorating inspiration, and I LOVE all your "green" tips! We are moving into our first house over the summer, and I have a big commitment to keeping our lives as green as possible.
    Thanks for this personal post. It's always fun to see the voice behind the author:)

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  26. Great post...no one is perfect and sometimes when you read blogs you can forget that!
    It's sad that people feel the need to leave negative or hateful comments for you. It's true, they are unhappy with their own lives or circumstances and are trying to bring you down to their level. Misery loves company!

    Keep up the good work...I love reading your blog and getting inspired by your home projects :)

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  27. Don't worry too much- Lots of us have struggled with fertility & do have kiddos one way or another. I have a really crappy realtionship with my inlaws, hate my voice (Yikes, I really do sound like Moon Unit Zappa) & swear like a trucker - (Oops I have truckers who are very polite as clients- I sound much, much worse than my client truckers) I have tatoos, too - strangely one was my ex's name on my hip-I had a cover done over it when I married the current hubby. Have a good weekend- You have a beautiful home & a great guy. Ignore mean comments-some people just don't" play nice"-Boy,don't I sound like the bossy mom that I am!
    Happy Victoria Day!

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  28. Great post Ashli. I have been considering one similar but have been wary of it. We all think you're pretty awesome and that you're doing a great job.
    Chin up buttercup!

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  29. This was fantastic. You definitely don't sound crazy. To us readers, when you're open and honest it makes you writers feel so much more real and personable. Thank you for being brave enough to be vulnerable. I myself also deal with some of the things in your list (1 and 3 especially), and it's always nice to know I'm not alone.

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  30. You're awesome and I loved this post. Just found your blog but I will admit to it already being one of my favorites (out of like 200 - ego boost! :)

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  31. Ashli, what you describe is what makes us human. No one has it all together, and if they seem to it's because they have an entourage of people behind the scenes helping them. Yes, blogging makes it look easy. We post what we want about our lives and leave the minor and sometimes really ugly details out. And btw – a lot of my blogger friends that say if you get “hate mail/comments” you can say you’ve arrived. I’d say don’t worry about stuff, but that would make me hypocritical because I worry about everything too.

    Thanks for blogging. :)

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  32. I've been very forthcoming about my life on my blog. At first it was unintentional. A mistake. And then it was just telling it like it is. I would much rather hear what's really going on than a bunch of fluff.
    Brenda

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  33. So honest and refeshing...thanks for sharing. I too feel like blogs often just show all the pretty, styled, perfect, moments and stuff in our lives..and I know that no one lives like that every day! Impossible!! Nice to read about the real people behind the keyboard and lens.
    Have a great weekend ~ Laura

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  34. Love it, great post so glad you were brave enough to push that publish button. I worry A LOT too I spoke to someone about it the other day and they asked if I get headaches a lot - yep - its the strain of the worry. We must learn to relax :)

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  35. You are soooo not crazy! We all have our issues. My big one is I tell myself that I am not good enough, smart enough, talented enough, etc.... I have been wanted to start a blog for my family in NY (born and raised), but keep putting it off because I have frozen myself with these fears of incapability!

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  36. Hi Ashli,

    I think it is very brave to do an honest post like that. No one's life is perfect. And you know what - I like you even more now. :)

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  37. I read your post almost daily, and I love your home and your style. It's so cool that your husband is supportive and adores you. Ignore the haters. I'm pretty certain they would trade places with you in a minute if given the opportunity. I can assure you they do not have a loving husband and a beautiful home. How sad for them.

    I didn't get pregnant until I was 35 and we were trying for 10 years! I gave birth to our Little Mister at 36. We are blessed now with two children (although when they get to be teenagers and young adults, you tend to wonder, 'Where is the Blessing?'). Ha ha! God Bless You, Ashli, and I look forward to your posts.

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  38. Hi! It looks like you are getting a lot of support. I love your blog and wanted to tell you that I think what you did, speaking your truth, was very brave. It makes you "real" to your readers and it makes me like your blog even more. I feel I can relate to you. A lot of blogs that I read do make me feel like my life is not as perfect as theirs. It is nice to know that there are real people with real life issues writing these blogs. Please try to ignore the haters. Like the one comment said, the anonymity of the internet allows people to be hateful. You rock! Keep up the good work!

    Stephanie Williams

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  39. Hi Ashli, loved this post, have been following your blog for a while - I love it. You always give me the extra boost I need to organise my kitchen drawers! Ignore the meanie. Anna x

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  40. I have been reading your blog for few weeks and never left comments. I just want to let you know that I think you are awesome!

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  41. Hello Ashli
    I found your blog two months ago, and simply love your posts.
    It is true these things in Blogs gives the false idea that everything is perfect.
    I like to know that you're a normal person like any other, with fears and challenges and also courageous.
    Yes expose ourselves is not easy.
    I have a blog and I'm afraid to expose myself to it, live in a small island where everyone knows each other.
    At the same time I want to share it with anyone who likes the same things as me, and yet afraid of criticism.
    We all have fears, being a mother also was one of them.
    I have a girl aged 5 years, I am so grateful that God has given me this opportunity.
    All the best for your family, I am sure that one day these will give us the news "I'll be a mother"
    A follower of a very tiny and beautiful island called Madeira.

    Xoxo

    Lulu

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  42. I LOVED this post! I do agree that sometimes the readers do think everything is perfect in blogland. However, I know that everyone's life isn't always perfect and I loved the wake up call you gave us. I have been following you for several months now and I have to say that yours is one of my favorites!! Keep up the good work, girl. :)

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  43. Love this post! It really makes me feel better that I am not the only one who curses at their sewing machine. I really enjoy reading blogs when the blogger post things like this. Blogs are my breif break during the day so when I get to laugh out loud it makes it all that better (laughing at the cursing comment:)!

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  44. I think this is my favorite post out of all of them you've done! I love getting to know my favorite blogger friend in Canada more than just what new lamp or pillow you made--even though I love that too!

    Thanks for sharing!!

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  45. I will say that I fall into that 'I could never been a blogger, my life isn't perfect enough' attitude. Thanks for sharing and allowing us to know you a bit more. As far as the phone voice, I can still almost always tell who my Mom is talking to because she has a different voice for different people when she is on the phone. Thanks again for sharing.

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  46. Please know Ashli that you are loved and admired by the far majority. Don't let the haters get you down. You are a blessing to many. BTW, my husband has the same problem as your #2. Thanks for your honesty and vulnerability.

    Joyce Meyer has been a real blessing in my life. Watch her video on "Facing Fear and Finding Freedom" here:

    http://www.joycemeyer.org/BroadcastHome.aspx?video=Facing_Fear_and_Finding_Freedom_%E2%80%93_Pt_1

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  47. First of all, you are a STAR! I can't imagine ANYONE saying a bad thing about your or your blog! Honestly, your blog posts are one of my highlights to read. I LOVE when I see a new post in my inbox from you. I love your style. I love your writing. So yes, DELETE those negative comments. I can't imagine anyone having a bad thing to say about you. You're lovely!!

    And I also hope you have kiddo's someday. But rest assured, it's ok if you can't multitask. You'll be a great mommy!!

    Thanks for being so open and sharing today!!
    Jen
    athomeinthenorthwestblog.com

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  48. Hi Ashli, I love your blog from far away in Africa. This particular one I enjoyed, kinda makes me feel like I've met you in real life. Don't stress the small stuff. My sister, who's house is chaos once said something to me:" Why worry about the toys/balls etc lying around, you pick it up and pack it away and 5 min later it's in another spot again" That made me think whether she was pointing a finger at my obsessive tidiness, BUT I took it much further, and decided that I could apply that to little itty bitty things I stress/worry about. Worked for me. Keep blogging, and ignore the jealous ones. If you were not worth it, they would not have taken THEIR time to write something (good or bad) Warm hugs from Africa

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  49. Just so you know, every afternoon I look forward to getting a "Maillardville Manor" in my inbox! I love reading your blog, THANK YOU for sharing your life with me.

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  50. Thanks so much for sharing Ashli! Your blog is the highlight of my morning and I just wanted to say thank you!
    XX
    Aubrey

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  51. Ashli,

    I almost never comment on your blog, but have followed it for a long time. I just read your post. I can't tell you how much I loved it!!! I think there is such a push these days to be positive in everything that we forget to be real with people, to let people know what is really going on in our lives and what some of our struggles are. I don't mean gossiping or airing inappropriate dirty laundry, but just real, personal struggles. In my family, my husband and daughter are going through several recent, incredibly difficult medical diagnoses. (In the past year alone: severe, life threatening food allergies for my daughter, celiac disease for both of them, eosinophilic esophagitis for my daughter, and meniere's disease for my husband.) There have been so many days when I've felt totally alone. When my daughter was diagnosed with food allergies, people said I should just be glad because now I know, and I was so angry because they had no idea how much it turned our lives upside down.

    All that being said, I applaud you for being real and vulnerable in such a public forum. I know bloggers face cruel and harsh comments from crazy people and I am so sorry. But from the rest of us, thank you. And by the way, I have two children, multiple medical issues, and I don't multitask well at all either. I think multitasking is overrated. I can be done without being able to multitask. Just a little bit slower. :-)

    Katie

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  52. Yes, you ARE brave to share things with us that you were afraid to share. You ARE awesome, Lee isn't the only one that thinks this, just the most important one to think it. As for the MEAN PEOPLE, they can just go read some where else!
    I tend to think those MEAN PEOPLE are just jealous of your amazing decorating skills and vision, and that you are married to a great guy (which you so deserve). I don't think Lee will ever leave you, but on the horrible chance that were to happen, you would be able to make a well paid living with your decorating talents. You are very smart, funny and I like a girl that needs bleeping. Hugs to you Ashli.

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  53. You are super cute! I was so happy to find out that you curse! I always wondered! Hee! You remind me a lot of myself. So much so that I think we'd be really good friends! Love your blog and this post!! :D

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  54. Well, I can say this: we have #1, 2 and 6 in common, and now that I know we are alike in those ways, I will enjoy your blog even more. Thank you so much for sharing and keeping it real! :)

    Lisa

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  55. This made me like you even more!

    1.) I'm a worrier by nature, and it drives Zac nuts. He always tells me to stop worrying so much!

    2.) I'm SORT of in a similar boat. I only have a MIL, but things are much better than in the past. It's just hard when we're different kinds of people.

    3.) I am wondering if we're going to have problems conceiving, because I have a history of irregularities, and Zac isn't getting any younger. (He's 6 years older than I am).

    4.) PEOPLE ARE ASSHOLES. There. I said it. If YOU get negative comments or e-mails, then ANYONE is susceptible. You put nothing but positive vibes out there, and in no way portray yourself as a princess. So please do NOT let these people get to you.

    5.) ME TOO. I would make a sailor blush.

    6.) I like to think I'm decent at multi-tasking, but sometimes it just turns into a big fail.

    7.) I also don't like my voice. I think it's too mousy. I can't wait for your VLOG!

    8.) Zac has tattoos, but I don't yet. I want to make sure I find something that I'm 100% happy with. I want something to represent my love for the ocean.


    Okay, that was one of the longest comments I've ever left on a blog... haha.

    ofthepacific.com

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  56. Ashli, love your blog! I'm SURE people are just jealous. I have a neighbor who is jealous because I'm a housewife and she goes to a job she hates. You do an awesome job and I love your tips - especially organic stuff & organic lawn care. I don't have your talent. :( Haters stink!!!

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  57. Thanks for sharing. Your honesty is refreshing. It's nice to know that bloggers are just like the rest of us!

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  58. Thanks for keeping it real. Love your blog! Can't wait to read more :)

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  59. Ashli,
    I've been reading your blog for a long time, when you were still in your townhouse and in the process of selling and moving. It's been a great adventure and I've enjoyed every blog tremendously. There will always be someone who will be negative and nasty, but as everyone that has posted today agrees they are jealous or intimated. I also worry alot too, I guess its just in our genes. I think you have the perfect husband that any gal could have, he is lucky to have you and you are lucky to have him, when he is so willing to do so many of your wishes. But when you have the name of "Lee" that also is in your genes. Keep posting for all your followers both young and old. God Bless You!!

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  60. Thank you for sharing your "secrets". First, I am sorry that people are so rude as to writing mean things. ( Why I hate FB!). You seem like a beautiful person. What is so nice about blogs is that we realize we are not weird or odd. Your worrying problem? most women do the very same thing as you, me included. If we worry about every possible disaster, than maybe it won't happen.
    Strained relations with in-laws? You would be in the minority if they weren't!!!
    Your voice? Not many people love the sound of their voice!
    Cursing? Come on!!
    Now that I think about it, all the things you wrote about describe "women"!
    You are young and don't realize it yet.
    Enjoy you. Enjoy your beauty now.
    Xo

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  61. I love your blog too. Love your style! I have been debating starting my own blog (I have a family one but I am wanting to start one about organizing and such) but I too worry about what people may say. Logically I know that it shouldn't matter what others think but truthfully, words hurt. Hang in there! The people you are trying to connect with/to love what you do! Also, I love that you posted about some of your "faults". It makes you that much more relatable.

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  62. Sorry to hear about the comments but remember that an intentionally mean or nasty comment shows how much the writer hates themselve, their life at that moment. It isn't about you. I would say your faults are just part of being human and there are millions of us with some or all of faults. And I will take the liberty to say to keep the family relationships in house, it can come back to bite.
    Only found your blog a few months ago and really enjoy it. Good Job.
    Dee

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  63. Wow, this post was so very good. The number of responses shows you just HOW good it was. We're all just people, and sometimes it is comforting to see that we sit in the same boat.
    No. 1 Like you, I worry a LOT. I believe (sort of) that you have to worry. Otherwise you jinx it and the thing that you fear will happen (because you didn't worry enough about it).
    No. 2 Strained is a nice word for the relationship that I have with my in-laws. I should just simply refer to No. 5 right here.
    No. 3 I was not able to have children. Everything tested o.k., but it just never happened. Always a difficult topic when talking to other people.
    No. 4 That just blows my mind! Never, ever, ever, address any of the negative comments. Don't give an ugly person a platform to perform. I am really baffled at this. People who don't even know you personally feel the need to be rude, crude and unkind!? I'm sure that they don't lead a happy live. So there.
    No. 5 Oh yeah, look back up at No. 2
    No. 6 Don't worry. My husband cannot talk and tie his shoes at the same time. Yet, he is extremely successful professionally. When I pick fun at him about this, he says that he "prefers" to give a single task his full attention.
    No. 7 Now I am curious! There is a wonderful interior design blog called Cote de Texas by Joni in Houston, TX. Look on her blog for one of the interviews that she has recorded. It will give you a giggle to hear her voice. And, oh yeah, it's real!
    No. 8 Tattoos? So you've been to prison, he? Just kidding!!!!
    No. 9 Your post was wonderfully good, and honest, and authentic.

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  64. I think your sweet Ashli and I like your blog.I believe the internet is where the mean girls from high school have gone since they have lost their original audience.Pay them no heed.Plus what is wrong with being a princess? ♥

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  65. You are a brave woman. I respect and admire your courage and agree with the comments above: haters hate. Sad for them, but painful for us too. It is hard not to take things personally.

    Your blog is a breath of fresh air and an inspiration to me as I improve my own blogs.

    Congratulations on this terrific blog.

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  66. Ashli, I love this post. So nice to hear some "imperfections" from bloggers who seem to have it all together (which I'm still convinced you do);) . I especially loved the cursing one...I soo pictured you saying things like "gosh, golly darn!" hahah. And the in-laws thing, I needed to read today. I was literally just thinking about this. Awesome post!

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  67. I look forward so much to getting the email that tells me you have posted ! Your blog is funny, thoughtful, creative , and inspiring ! I can not imagine that anyone could come up with mean or negative comments to make to you - but then again - there are mean spirited unkind people in this world - best thing to do ? IGNORE AND HIT DELETE - the older you get, the more you realize that attention is all they want - don't give them a second thought, or a mention - JUST DELETE - from the blog and from your mind. It is refreshing and inspirational to find a young woman who wants to stay home, have a family one day, and live a simple life with the person she loves. Be proud of that - you are doing the right thing, - stay on that path !

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  68. I think you are so brave, Ashli, to have spoken so openly & honestly. I do try to do that, but know that I'm certainly not being as forthcoming as you have just been in this post. I can honestly say that I've never had anyone be ugly or rude in their comments on my blog, but I can only imagine how hurt I would feel if that happened. My Gramma always told me, "if you can't say something nice, then don't say anything," & I've always tried to adhere to that philosophy. I feel ashamed for those people who would find it their "duty" to voice negativism. I think we all have our little (& big) fears that we deal with either behind closed doors or out in the open, & that's our own personal choice. I wish you and your husband all the best of luck on having children. My daughter & SIL struggled with that issue early on & did Invitro twice before they were blessed with twin daughters who are now almost 13 (going on 21....lol). I hope it works out that way for you as well. And, yep, you'd better learn how to multi-task!
    ~CAS~

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  69. I don't know you Ashli but I really, really like you. I enjoy your wit, I enjoy your taste, I enjoy how proud you sound when you present a project to us that you particularly enjoy. And you sound pretty normal to me. Thank you for sharing. When I'm telling my girls about something that I learned from your site I refer to you as my Canadian Blogger Girlfriend. And then I giggle. Because I don't even know you. Oh, and your photography just keeps getting better and better. I like the new styles you are trying. Keep it real!
    Catherine in Edmonds, USA

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  70. I like you better now! We have some of the same faults; I've overcome (I'm 56, I should hope so) some you, youth that you are, have not yet. Others I have we share. Others I have you don't. Thanks for being so open. If I didn't already subscribe, I would now.

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  71. You are amazing.

    You're so real and honest! I know you probably won't stop worrying or thinking, just remember that you not only have your awesome husband standing beside you, but a ton of people who have never met you there as well! We all love you and believe in you or else we wouldn't be here! Keep being happy, keep being yourself!

    And never forget that you're wonderful, beautiful and amazing!

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  72. Ditto on the inlaw thing...don't let people make u feel bad (really, how rude of them to write that stuff anyway!), and remember, u can always adopt. Hang in there...

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  73. Remember Ashli that when people write nasty comments it says so much more about who THEY are than it does about who you are.

    You are unique and special just the way you are. Rock on!

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  74. I love this post so much! Thank you for sharing so openly with us. I know nasty comments on the internet are awful (one person tweeted me on my wedding day to tell me that anyone with taste would think my wedding dress was hideous - I always thought people with taste kept their opinions to themselves!) but it helps me to remind myself that those sorts of comments only reflect on the person saying them.

    You have to be a pretty sad individual if the life of someone you've never met affects you to the point of saying nasty things to/about them.

    Congratulations on being you and doing what's right for you. Stuff what anyone else thinks!

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  75. Thank you for sharing, Ashli! You are very brave to put it out there like this! We are all not perfect and perfect is boring by the way:) And its so great that your husband is your number one fan! He is a keeper:):):)
    http://curlijuli.blogspot.com/

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  76. Thank you for sharing your life with us Ashli - I love you blog and respecting your followers enough to share says a ton about what a great person you are!! PS - I also curse way too much!!! :)

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  77. I love your blog and have been reading a while. I love it even more now! I appreciate the way that you shared your strained relationship with your inlaws. It's real life. You shared it in a classy, honest, graceful way. I can tell by the way you wrote it you have respect for them despite your differences. Keep up the good work! - A fan in TEXAS

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  78. To have a blog = risk
    You're opening yourself up to the world.

    To be transparent on your blog = strength
    We, all of us, have foibles and few there are who admit to them.

    Caustic commenters = haters
    And to borrow from my 12 y/o skateboarding son, "I <3 Haters".

    Multi-tasking = myth
    The skill set is more being able to compartmentalize and concentrate on what's in front of you at that moment.

    Waiting for children = perseverance
    We tried for over 10 years...adopted...loved it...adopted again. Your time, however and whenever, will come and it's a great opportunity to practice "multi-tasking."

    Your blog = lovely
    And inspiring, as I reiterate from my recent email

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  79. That was brave of you to post about your inlaws and I think you did it very respectfully. I'm sure you did help a lot of people who think they are alone in this regard. But seriously, you obviously love and adore their son, what more could they want?! :)

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  80. Princess Ashli. You just go ahead and be the best princess there is gosh darn it. LOL. I love your blog and I have told you this before. I have learned so much from your creativity and it has given me so much inspiration to do so many things I would have never tried before. So you rock on "Your Highness". Big hugs to ya.
    Racquel

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  81. Ashli I really appreciate your honesty. Your realness. Your normal-ness. I've actually stopped reading several well known blogs that are too good to be true. Successful? Yes, but helpful to my life? No. It makes me feel like I am not good enough and failing at life. It's like buying a magazine with all skinny models and whatever. That's not helpful, not real and not believable. I don't need more bullshit in my life. Real people rule.

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  82. Way to go Ashli!!! Girlfriend, we MUST catch up soon. I'll just leave it at that K?

    Big hugs.

    T.

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  83. thanks for being real, and like alot of people said ~ jealousy brings out the worst in people, they try to hurt those who "have" what they want. they seem to think it was just 'handed' to you like you and lee haven't worked hard for ur life and all u have. just remember that, it's hard like really really REALLY hard when u r reading those comments, emails, etc. know that for that one person there are prolly a thousand that think/feel the opposite. i know the heartache of not having kids, it took us 6 yrs to have our little guy, so please keep hoping. we have tried for the last yrs after the was born for more kids, more fertility treatments, the whole shebang but to no avail. so we are now in the process of fostering to adopt since regular private adoption is cost prohibitive. one way or another u can have a baby now days. please understand i mean that in the most heart wrenching totally understand your pain way. i think i sound like a southern chabaka, so totally get the whole voice thing, lol! and that non multitasker thing - no worries- just turn it around ur kiddos will know that they have your undivided attention - which is what ALL kids want - serioously, there are times i just close the computer, quit working on crafts or cleaning or whatever bcuz my lil man says "Momma, pay attention to me!" so its not a bad thing to be a non multitasker. :D

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  84. You're just the cutiest!! I enjoy your blog so much. Keep up the good work.

    Lori

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  85. I love this post! :) I think the tattoo was the most shocking/funny one...didn't see that one at all, but think that's awesome.
    As for being a worrier, I'm part of that club too...especially when Hubby is driving. He's a great driver and has proved it time and again, but I still can't handle it sometimes.
    And negative comments...there's always someone unfortunately.

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  86. I'm new to your blog and have to say, I think you & this blog are awesome. I've never understood why people will get behind a computer and suddenly feel empowered to unleash nastiness on others. I'm also a big time worrywart and my inlaws and I don't exactly see eye to eye, either. The only one I can't identify on is the tattoo - I'm waaaay to indecisive for that! :)

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  87. I too love your blog! I am not a blogger myself ... Just like to read others. Yours is definentlly one of my favorites. Just checked out the mml blog you posted about and started following her too! Thanks for all the inspiration!

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  88. Hi Ashli,
    I don't usually comment but felt compelled to when I read this. It's so disappointing to read about people being negative but I guess that's the way of the world!! I'm a worrier too and I hate it! Love reading your blog : )

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  89. Yay, Ashli, great post! I had to laugh about the "if Lee leaves you're screwed" comment--- um, given how awesome you are and what a beautiful/warm home you've created, I think it might be the other way around! Mean/envious/insecure people suck. Love, love, love reading your blog. Keep doing what you're doing! :)

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  90. Oh Ashli!! This post is so lovely! Honest and telling. Thanks for sharing. I think of you and your baby plans often. Much love,
    Becky :)

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  91. Oh Ashli!! This post is so lovely! Honest and telling. Thanks for sharing. I think of you and your baby plans often. Much love,
    Becky :)

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  92. My picture of you just got better! This was a great post -- all bloggers should shares stuff like this! Also, don't let the haters get to you. Haters gotta hate. You are lovely, and your blog is fantastic!

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  93. Thank you for being real to us blog readers. I know people can be nasty and its hard not to take it personally but truly let it roll of your back its jealously.

    I worry too, far too much to the point of getting migraines often. I also have a strained relationship with my finances family, mainly the females and there are alot of them so any time I am around them I get my migraines! Its gotten to the point where I pretend I dont have one just because they happen so often when I am around them. I have to limit my visits for a day trip or ill end up in very bad shape. Hoping one day I will wake up and not give a shit and realize that we can only be ourselves and if that's not good enough screw em! P.S. I swear alot too!

    Your blog is the only one I have consistently read since you were in your townhome days and you inspire me to spring clean, dust off my sewing machine, create new diy projects, stay green and even clean up my xmas decorations properly!

    "Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You." - Dr. Seuss
    Chantel

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  94. Hi Ashli,

    Normally I don't comment on blogs, I prefer to just enjoy reading them and marveling at all their incredible ideas. However, after reading your post, I just had to say something...

    l. I "used" to worry, but on the advice of a very good friend, now I just say I'm "concerned". In all reality, it means pretty much the same thing, but psychologically I feel less stressed "concerning" myself over things than "worrying" over them.

    2. The in-laws...my mother-in-law and I get along. As for my father-in-law and I - well, let's just say we did until he realized I was going to marry his son. Then I wasn't from the right family, not the same religion (he wasn't religious by the way). He didn't come to the wedding (matter of fact, only my husband's mother and sister came from his entire side of the family), and are you ready for this, didn't speak to us for 14 years. And, once he did, we basically tolerated each other. I decided a long time ago, I was married to my husband and not my father-in-law. By the way, we recently celebrated our 38th wedding anniversary (now you've got an idea how old I am). My parents worshiped the ground my husband and children walked on so that helped a lot.

    3. It took 7 years before our first son was born and another 3 before our second one arrived. They're almost 31 and 28 now which I know is older than you are. It would have been nice to have them earlier, but it was pretty much a miracle we had them at all. So what I'm saying is, don't give up hope!

    4. As for negative or nasty comments, that's what the delete key is for. I am so impressed with all the accomplishments you've managed to achieve at such a young age. Someone once told me that the more successful you are (or accomplishments you have) people are going to throw rocks at you to try and bring you down, because of their jealousness. Try not to let them bother you (I know, easier said than done).

    5. I've been known to utter a few words myself, 'nuff said there.

    6. I do like to think I multitask fairly well. I had to learn that though. And, even if you feel you don't, so what?

    7. I don't like my voice either. I'm always surprised when I hear my recorded voice....gah!

    8. I don't have any tattoos, but my sister has one - obviously, she's way cooler than I am.

    9. Keep impressing us with your improvements, organizing skills, recipes and ideas. I (along with many others) look forward to all your postings.

    Mary

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    Replies
    1. You clearly have the gift of encouragment. I loved reading your "realness", too.

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  95. Hi Ashli,
    I'm a big fan of your blog and have never posted until now.. and I have to admit that I did think you lived a rather perfect life! Your home decorating is so creative and wonderful, I'm jealous that you and your husband do some many projects together (my husband and I know NOTHING of construction or anything remotely DIY.. it's taken us months just to get pictures hung up on the walls in our new home!), the meals you post look delicious, and you just seem so.. on top of everything and put together. I think it's very brave and very human to post a list like this, letting people know that your life isn't as perfect as it seems.. and truly, no one's is. We always compare without thinking, and seem to think the grass is greener somewhere else (altho truth be told, your house's grass IS greener than mine... that's another project my hubbie and I have been putting off!!). And thinking this way, and playing the comparison game, never leads to anything productive!

    As for your list, I am right there with you on #1. I worry CONSTANTLY, about completely irrational things. Just last week, after I found a book on Amazon called "Signs of Life", which is about a woman who lost her husband in a tragic accident, I dissolved into a crying fit, convinced my husband was going to get into an accident and I would lose him. Then the other day, I had a muscle pain in my chest and was convinced I was having a heart attack (at age 27...?) and would die. I worry about the most irrational things constantly and it's ridiculous. I did actually have to stop watching medical shows because they made me worry about death and accidents and sickness even more than I do! It's pathetic. :P But I also think, "ok, if I think this, I'm prepared for it.. it can't possibly happen"... which, I swear, is going to bite me in the ass someday. :P

    I also dislike my voice. But contrary to yours, mine seems very low to me and I am constantly worried that I sound like a man. And I don't want to sound like a man!! I am a lady!!!

    Also, I cannot multitask either. When I try, I get really stressed and flustered, then have to take a breath, make a list, and concentrate on one thing at a time.

    Ok, I think that's it for now. This is quite a doozy for my first comment!! But I do love reading your blog and (jealously) ;) watching the beautiful ways you decorate and redecorate your house. You are truly talented.

    -Emily Stinson

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  96. OH Ashli.....you are so brave & sweet to be so honest! Thank you for sharing & maybe one day our paths will cross & I will give you a great big hug!

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  97. Awe- I cannot imagine that anyone would say anything ugly like that to you. As for the worrying... I have the same dilema, if i don't worry about it, it may come true...so worrying is my safegaurd. It is totally backwards and I know it. We are all works in progress aren't we? Keep your head up.xoxo

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  98. thank you for sharing your "imperfections" with us...pull up a chair...LOL. We all have qualities that makes us unique...you were very lucky to find someone who loves those qualities and then some.

    Thank you for being honest and brave enough to share parts of yourself with us...in return, I'd like to offer my words of encouragement and to looking forward to more great work on your blog! much {{{ HUGS to you }}}

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  99. Thanks for sharing all of these. I can't believe people spend their time sending you nasty comments! I really love your blog (even before I had my own) and love knowing some more stuff about "behind the scenes".

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  100. Ashli, Thanks for your transparency. I love your blog. I just finished making napkins using your napkin tutorial. You are awesome! (There. Now Lee is not the only one who can tell you that.)

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  101. Love your blog and this is my most favorite post ever! I must admit that sometimes when I'm looking at pics of your gorgeous home, I mentally beat myself up for being such a mess when you seem to have it all pulled together...so it was a relief to find out that you are very human after all! I am a HUGE worrier also...some of us just have brains that are wired for worrying...and I also have a "phone voice"! I know exactly what you mean about feeling awkward and weird. And as far as having kids, keep the faith...you are going to be an amazing mom!

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  102. Yep, I agree. You're awesome. I've learned so much from your blog and have slowly transformed my house into a home I love! Thanks for sharing of yourself and creating this wonderful on-line community.

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  103. I think you're fantastic! And very brave. I read your blog every day and I never say anything. But you inspire me so much! I want my house to look as great as yours!!!

    Ana.

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  104. This was so so nice. You are inspiring. And let me tell you, I can guarantee that those mean comments were brought on by one thing: jealousy. Whoever wrote them is so completely jealous that you thought ahead about how you wanted to live and made it happen. Good for you. I (along with many many others) will keeping visiting and send you nothing but good vibes and wishes of happiness and much much luck on adding a little one to the Manor .

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  105. I LOVED this post! I'll be honest, I've always thought of you (And please don't take this the wrong way!) as a sort of stepford wife because you're perfect, all the time, every meal, every home post, and I wonder, how does she not go crazy staying at home?! Only because I've been a stay at home wife for a year (not by choice) and am bored out of my mind, not to mention I definitely don't have a perfectly clean house like you do! It's nice to see that you aren't as perfect ( I would have never guessed the swearing!) and held together as you seem. :)

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  106. Great post, Ashli!!! I love knowing more of the 'real' you! :) F$&# yeah!! ;)

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  107. Ashli,

    I think your bravery is to be commended. And if it makes you feel any better, I worry. A LOT. Sometimes about crazy things that shouldn't even warrant a moment of my time. It's always nice to know I'm not the only one out there who struggles with this. I hope you have a wonderful Tuesday!

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  108. Love that you were able to put yourself out there like this. I know it's not easy to do.

    Sorry you have received such hurtful comments. I have as well, and I know how hard it is to turn those off and move on with your day. I let them eat and eat and eat at me, even when I know they are just ridiculous and have no credibility. We put our hearts into our blogs and to know someone has a negative thought is hard, but you know what, you get thousands of virtual high fives, and that is what matters! You are amazing and have a great sense of style and insane organizing abilities. Stay true to you and do it because you love it. No one will adore everything we do, which is what makes blogging so great; we are all unique and are just sharing what works for us and what we love and hopefully someone can find inspiration as well.

    Love you girl!

    xoxo,
    Jen

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  109. I love finding blogs that are Canadian. I love it even more when they're from BC. You have a beautiful home, very inspirational : )

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  110. It drives me banana's when I read about negative Nancy's leaving comments. I feel like if you dislike what someone is writing/doing then don't read the damn blog. There's no sense in making someone feel down on themselves about the life that they lovingly invite you to read about.

    I love that you're Canadian and that you swear. For some reason you swearing makes me happy. I love a good F bomb. It's a great stress reliever.

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  111. I don't read blogs to often anymore, but when I do, I always hit up yours. It's SO wonderful! I love that you are in Canada too. I'm an American in Ontario and I'll probably be here the rest of my life. (I married a Canadian.) I just love reading about the deals you find so I can try and implement them in my own home. We even have the same washer and dryer. Ha! :) Anyways, thanks for your honesty! Sometimes, you're right, it is severely lacking in blog world. So sorry you had such negative comments. People suck sometimes.

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  112. Ashli,
    You are so creative, thoughtful, and talented that some people think they need to take some of that away from you in order to get it for themselves. Silly, right? I don't know anyone else who would lay on the floor to snap pictures of how the board and batten wall treatment fits into the baseboard- and you did that for me :) My heart is hurting for you because I want you to be a mom and I wish it were easy for you. And we all should be so lucky to have someone realize that if our husbands left us, we would be screwed. That's what love is- needing the other person. That meanie was really giving your relationship a compliment! And I effing {just for you} love your recipe for the coconut curry soup! It has become a family fave!
    xoxo
    Abby

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  113. As many before, I read often but rarely leave a comment. Just wanted to let you know this post was uber-cute, and it must have taken some nerve to write it up!

    As for the content itself, I guess we girls do tend to worry too much. I'm glad you're sharing your life with someone who can bring balance to that! You seem like such a sweet couple!
    On the "comments about how you guys choose to live as a couple", my view is that if someone doesn't like how you do it, well, that's their problem!
    I must admit it'd make me nervous to be a stay-home mom/wife. Not because "if the hubby leaves you, you're screwed", but because so much of my life has to do with things that originated from my work! (projects, friends, hobbies...) And yeah, there's always the "what-would-happen-if-God-prevent-it-something-happened-to-him" . It must be because one of my close friends passed away recently, leaving behind a loving wife and 2 wonderful young kids, and had she not had a job, things would have been just SO much harder than they already are!

    see? all the worrying coming back! but i digress... we all live our lives in whichever way seems to make the most sense. and whoever thinks s/he has found THE way is, IMHO, wrong!

    Lots of cheers for you and your neat blog,
    Isabel

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  114. The kerning is off on Lee's tattoo.

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  115. I have the in-law deal too,,,thanks for sharing,,,it is nice to see I'm not the only one.

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  116. I don't comment very often either but I often read.

    Glad you are so real. You do so much very well, but hey, you are not absolutely perfect. Someone once told me that if ever you meet a perfect person STAY AWAY FROM THEM, cause you will be sure to mess them up.

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  117. What a refreshing post! It was really great to read. I haven't touched my own blog in almost a year because I just dont feel it is worthy of all the great ones I follow ( yours being one of them), so it was nice to hear that you have fears too. Thanks for sharing :)

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  118. Hi Ashli,

    I'm a worrier too. I try not to, but sometimes I just can't help it.

    Regarding swearing: because of the kids I try to hold it in and say something like "Cheese and crackers!!!", but when there are no kids around my hubby says I "swear like a longshoreman". Which is true because my grandpa was my nanny as a kid and he was a retired longshoreman!

    RE: Having kids. I just want to tell you to not give up! I had a hard time getting pregnant and then several miscarriages. It was hard to even see a pregnant woman or a baby. I was totally crushed and stressed about it. Then I decided that if it was going to happen, it would happen. I tried to not worry about it and then it just happened. I had bleeding and complications throughout the pregnancy, but she made it and is now 9 years old. After she was born, I felt so happy and fortunate! When she was 9 months old, I got pregnant again. This time no complications - nothing was going to stop this kid! The girls are 18 months apart in age. I wanted to share this with you because I felt like we were never going to have any kids and now we have three! Good luck!

    Kat

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  119. Hello Ashli, I really enjoy reading your blog. Due to time constraints, I'm not able to stop by as often as I'd like. It is, however, really nice to read a very personal blog post. I too have a strained relationship with my in-laws and am very jealous/envious of friends who have it so easy. But I mostly wanted to comment on #3. Because I don't stop by your blog often, I don't know your specific details but wanted to provide you with food-for-thought. I apologize if I'm over-stepping my bounds.

    Have you ever heard of the Weston Price Foundation? If not, here's a link to what they stand for: http://www.westonaprice.org/nutrition-greats/weston-price

    The reason I mention Weston Price is because I wanted to provide this information to you in the hopes it could help you in some way. Here's a link to their website that quickly lists the nutrients they believe help with conception: http://www.westonaprice.org/childrens-health/vitamins-for-fetal-development-conception-to-birth

    And lastly, here are some other blogs that describe Weston Price's views on fertility diets:

    http://www.naturallyknockedup.com/fertility-diet/

    http://nourishedkitchen.com/foods-for-fertility/

    Good luck to you! I wish you all the best in making this a reality for you and your husband!

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  120. It takes guts and personality to open up and to show "the other side". You can be proud of yourself and you just continue to be great and special as you are. Lee certainly found a great person.
    Bogi (from Germany)

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  121. I think you are lovely and sweet, and I love your blog! This was a very brave post, and thank you for sharing! Keep up the good work!

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  122. I stumbled across your blog yesterday, and added it to my daily reads, I love your style. Also, I just wanted to chime and in an let you know that you're not alone in dealing with infertility...my husband and I struggle with it too....if you ever feel like venting...find me on instagram, there's a wonderful support group. :)

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  123. I stumbled across your blog yesterday, and added it to my daily reads, I love your style. Also, I just wanted to chime and in an let you know that you're not alone in dealing with infertility...my husband and I struggle with it too....if you ever feel like venting...find me on instagram, there's a wonderful support group. :)

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  124. From a woman in her 30s with a full time career (teacher) who never thought getting married and having a family was an option (that looks like it is changing!) I have been absolutely fascinated with reading your blog. I never dreamed that running and maintaining a household was an option or even something I wanted to do. We have gone from women being expected to not work and stay at home to it almost being frowned upon if two incomes are not being brought home. As if the stay at home housewife is lazy and just doesn't want to work. From reading about your life, it is evident that you put in just as much effort and time into running your household as any of us with jobs outside of the home. Anyone who puts you down for it is jealous and petty. My whole view of what I want is rapidly changing from having a multitude of expensive things which can only be brought home by continuing in my stressful job to wanting to get married, run a household, and have a simpler, more peaceful life. Thank you for showing me that being a housewife is a noble choice and a lifestyle that I may one day have.

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  125. Firstly.. I have to say that along side my Ellen Degeneres show, Downton Abby, and working on an art project :D lol Your blog has been a go to place for me. I love coming here and reading, and checking your your newest ideas, and seeing max! Who ironically looks like my Oliver (silkshire terrier) :) I think one reason your blog stands out is.. because you are honest and uncensored about the things you enjoy! and well, things that aren't so perfect. Thank you for opening up your home, ideas, and family-- to silly viewers like myself. Because of this blog, my anxious self-- has officially redone our formally drab kitchen, and well.. I feel proud! Great post.

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  126. p.s. (33 no kiddo's yet either) In the same boat ;)

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